What would your life look like with NO FEAR?
What would you be able to do, create, and experience? If you really take the time to imagine this, you’ll feel a HUGE sense of relief… Like a big weight has been lifted from your shoulders. Without fear, you would be able to experience complete and utter freedom.
It’s FEAR that really keeps us chained to our limiting beliefs and insecurities and holds us back from expressing the inherent power that’s inside each of us. If we didn’t believe the fear, it would hold no power over us. But that’s really the hard part… How do you overcome fear? How do you stop giving fear any reality?
Well, I just wanted to let you all know HOW I overcame my biggest fear this past weekend… And hopefully this story will inspire you to let go of YOUR fears and step into your true power!
If you read the ‘About Katie’ section of my blog, you’ll see that I grew up incredibly shy and introverted. It was extremely difficult for me to speak and express myself at all and I was constantly consumed with fear… Fear of what others thought of me, fear of how I appeared or looked, fear of being rejected, fear of not being loved (I could go on and on). But as I grew older, that fear slowly dissipated and I was able to grow more and more into my true self.
Overcoming Fears, One Step At A Time…
Being an entrepreneur has been a HUGE catalyst in helping me overcome many of the insecurities and limiting beliefs that I was still holding onto…
The first time I ever had to make a video, I was extremely nervous and intimidated… But I did it, and now I’ve been able to use video to create a massive online presence and profitable business for myself.
The first time I ever had to do a training call for my team, I was very nervous… But as I overcame that fear, team training calls became less and less scary. It was the same experience with doing webinars… In fact, the big webinar I did for the community last week even made me nervous at first. But the more I pushed myself to ‘just do it’ and overcome my fears, the less of a grip fear really had over me.
My Ultimate Fear…
But my BIGGEST fear is, without a doubt, public speaking. The mere thought of it still makes my body quiver and my stomach nauseous… It is the one thing I dread the most!
The very first time I ever had to speak in public was last year. I was asked by my company to fly out to Las Vegas and speak at an event in front of about 150 people. I was scared to death, but I tried to hide my fear as I walked up to the front of the room with the microphone in hand…
As I started speaking, my throat became extremely constricted and it was very hard to breathe all of a sudden. My heart was beating out of my chest and I was convinced that everyone could hear it through the microphone! Like a deer in headlights, my mind completely blanked on the speech I had prepared. An overwhelming feeling of weakness started flowing throughout my entire body and I realized that I was about to faint! My knees started buckling and before I hit the ground, I ran back to my seat and held my head down before I went unconscious. My body was trembling, sweating, and I felt incredibly sick and nauseous.
I was absolutely humiliated… I wanted to just shrivel up into a little ball and disappear. Thankfully everyone around me was very understanding and compassionate and tried their best to make me feel better. That day was one of the most embarrassing, but yet one of the most growth-inducive experiences of my entire life!
Facing It Again…
After that, I knew I needed to overcome my fear of public speaking if I wanted to fully step into my own power. So when my company asked me to speak again this past weekend in Orlando, Florida, I had to say yes. My mind was resisting it and I was tempted to start coming up with any excuses I could think of to NOT do it… But my heart was telling me that this was important. I needed this chance to truly overcome my biggest fear and really walk the walk when it comes to personal growth and development.
So the morning of my speech, I spent some time alone in my room and did some deep breathing. I sat there with my eyes closed and envisioned myself walking out on stage with power. In my mind, when I looked out to see the crowd of people staring back at me, I felt the feeling of being completely and utterly FREE. I consciously invoked the feeling of freedom from any fear, worry, anxiety, or inhibitions. I chose to see this moment as a step towards the realization of my own power and freedom, not as something to fear.
Instead of worrying about nearly fainting again or imagining another awful scenario, I consciously chose to only focus on feeling empowered and free. Whatever we focus on, we create… And there was no way I was going to sabotage myself by creating mental pictures of what I DIDN’T want. I mentally rehearsed the outcome that I DID want.
I also decided to feel my inner body and get very connected to myself beforehand. I spent some time observing my inner state and accepting whatever it was I was feeling. My body was still experiencing the physiological response of being scared and nervous, but instead of resisting it, I just accepted it with compassion. I had the sense of, ‘Oh, that’s just my body feeling nervous. That’s completely ok, and I see it as part of the growth process.’
After getting grounded and centered, I made my way down to the event. There were about 400 excited people in the room. I made my way backstage to get hooked up with a microphone and waited for my turn to go out on stage. As my name was called, I walked out there with a smile…
When I looked out to the crowd, I remembered what I had practiced about feeling empowered and free when I saw everyone looking back at me. I will admit, I was still incredibly nervous and started trembling when the words came out of my mouth.
Instead of focusing on how I looked or what others thought, I chose to focus on what I could GIVE to my audience. The more I spoke, the less nervous I became and the words flowed out of me clearly. When I finished and walked backstage, I was greeted with big hugs from everyone helping out behind the curtain (Most everybody had heard about the ‘incident’ the year before!). I felt so relieved and really proud of myself that I did it! I overcame the biggest fear of my entire life!
I sat back down in the audience and the speaker who went up after me decided to share the story of what happened to me the year before… The audience was so impressed and everyone was clapping proudly for me!
An Inspiration For Others…
For the rest of the weekend, I had TONS of people coming up to me and telling me how much of an inspiration that was for them to see. They witnessed a huge tipping point in my life and watched me overcome a tremendous fear. They were all inspired to now go out and conquer the fears that were holding them back in life. Although they were inspired, no one could tell it was my first time really speaking in front of such a large audience… They all said it looked like I’d been doing it for years!
It is such an AMAZING feeling to overcome a fear that had such a strong grip on me… And I can’t even begin to express how empowering it truly is. When you overcome any fear you have, whether large or small, you move one step closer to freedom. And you start to see just how darn powerful you really are when you no longer let fear control your life.
Personal Growth…
This is really what the personal growth journey is all about. Without challenges, we would never grow. And the people who are the most successful are those who have GROWN the most. So how do you really overcome fear?
Face it head on.
The more you run from fear or run from things that challenge you, the more you run from success. So I encourage you to ’seek out’ experiences that terrify you. Challenge yourself to face your fears and regardless of the outcome, you’ll be growing by leaps and bounds. There really is no such thing as failure… Only experiences that challenge us to grow.
I don’t see my experience in Las Vegas as a failure at all. In fact, that was exactly the experience I needed to have to help me overcome this crazy fear of public speaking! Now, I’m sure I’ll still experience nervousness again next time I have to speak in public… But now I have an inner strength that will keep getting stronger and stronger the more I challenge myself to grow.
One of the biggest reasons people don’t experience the success they’re looking for in life is their FEAR. They run from their fears, they run from what challenges them, and then they wonder why they’re not more successful. It’s actually a very simple thing to figure out… But not always an easy one to do!
So when it comes to building a business for yourself and creating the life you want, what’s holding YOU back? What are your biggest fears? I’d love to hear from you, so please share them in the comment box down below. Just by acknowledging them and writing them down, they’ll already have less of a grip on you.
And if you’ve had the courage to go out and FACE one of your fears, I’d love to hear your story as well! The more transparent and real we are with each other, the more we’re able to really support and help each other along the path of personal growth and transformation. Our stories of courage are true inspirations for others!
It was so great to share this story with you here today and I hope I was able to inspire YOU to overcome your fears and start living a life of true freedom!
And please TWEET this out to your Twitter followers! I’d love to share this with as many people as possible!
Yours In Freedom,
Katie Freiling
P.S. I had asked a friend to record my speech, but unfortunately the flip cam ran out of juice right before I went on stage. I’m in the process of getting a copy of it from my company, so I’ll keep you updated and post it when I get it!
August 13th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Hi Katie,
Amazing post. I’m a speaker, and it comes naturally to me, but I still remember the first speech I gave.
I was about 8 years old and was speaking in my religious organization to a group of about 150. I had carefully prepared my speech, and it was all written out on index cards. The speech was supposed to last about 5 minutes.
When I took the stage, I was so nervous that I started talking at top speed and got through 5 minutes worth of notes in about 1 minute, then I raced off the platform.
I thought I wasn’t going to survive the experience. The good news is, I did, and I’ve taken the stage lots of times since then and have grown into my gift.
You took me back to my first speech, at 8 years old.
Thank you for the inspiration to face fear and do it anyway.
Valerie Love
Inspirational Guide
Valerie Love´s last blog ..God Is In Love With You–the book by Valerie Love
August 13th, 2009 at 2:40 pm
Hi Katie. It’s been a while since I last posted a comment. This biographical article on fear is quite encouraging. I can relate. There is no excuse. I am african american. But of course that is not a factor in todays society. However there is the “Fear Factor.” I can be my own worst enemy. That is quite a battle. A battle that can be overcome as long as one is willing to face their fears.
You gave a wonderful example of that. Broken down to the smallest denominator. Like a psychoemo-mathematician. That is what I needed. I just have to apply it. Knowledge is king only when it is utilized for success. Thanks again Katie. God bless you my sister.
Yours in New Birth.
August 13th, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Hi Katie, that was an awesome story and I loved it! I know for myself I have fear of speaking in front of 10 people, it just scares the crap out of me! You know though for right now I fear just like making my first video for youtube and to be honest with you I haven’t made one yet! I have been putting it off and making excuses and telling myself that I don’t know how to use this little camcorder, it’s an Insignia and the guy at BestBuy told me it was better than a flip or just as good and it’s an HD and plus it was $100 cheaper than a flip and it also cam with a small dvd that you are suppose to download on your computer I guess and that’s another thing I’m scared that I will mess something up on my computer because I’m a Welder by trade and I have only been using a computer for about 1 1/2 yrs. Technology scares me too so Katie with me you opened up a can of worms.lol…
No but really I am I am been just scared to do anything and I’m sick of it! You just Made My Day girlfriend! I been needing to hear that, what you were talking about. Your fears and you need to just get over it and like Nike says JustDoIt!
Thanks for sharing that wonderful story Katie. Be Blessed
and I was gonna tell you Katie that it always helps to go to the Lord in Prayer about it! It always helps to Pray about it and that it is anything! Take Care
August 13th, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Katie,
Great story! I’m glad you were able to overcome your fear, and great points to drive it home at the end of your post.
Along with fear is doubt. When doubt happens we get scared then fear comes creeping in. Like you said we have to think positive and stay positive or else fear will control us!
This post is very inspiring! Thanks for posting it!
Michael Feil´s last blog ..The Cycle of Achievement (Pt. 1)
August 14th, 2009 at 7:35 am
That is awesome Katie!
I recently got hypnotized in front of 300 people in Las Vegas, and making a total fool of myself on stage helped me overcome my fear of public speaking.
Thanks for always sharing the good stuff!
Nicholas
Nicholas´s last blog ..How Can YOU Get Over 57,934 Followers On Twitter, Automatically And Totally FREE?
August 19th, 2009 at 12:16 am
Nicholas
I never been hypnotized in my life. I think it was my fear to look silly, but bravo to you!
Tatyana
Tatyana gann´s last blog ..11 Steps To A Perfect Press Release That Brings Your Instant Credibility, Free Traffic and Make You Stand Out In The Crowd..
August 14th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
Hi Katie,
I saw you on stage this past weekend and I would never have suspected you had a fear of public speaking. You were poised and inspirational!
Thank you for sharing that with me. It is always helpful to see others walk through their fears. After all, courage is not the absence of fear, it’s acknowledging the fear and doing it anyway.
I have recently been made aware that fear can actually be excitement… When we risk stepping into the unknown, we allow space for the miracles to happen..
Let’s talk soon,
Sue
August 15th, 2009 at 11:42 am
Thank you Katie…. Fear is a doorway to many inspirational possibilities! Your amazing to me! Thank you for the inspiration you give to me! Jordan
Jordan Klimp´s last blog ..Integrating Empowerment & Financial Freedom
August 19th, 2009 at 12:15 am
Hi Katie
I can relate to your fear. My fear was about my accent.. My accent that kept me from speaking and being around other people. Though I used to teach in college I spoke my native language and I was not afraid to speak to people and teach students in the big classroom.
I realize that fear is just a thought we have..it is a feeling that we can control and our mind can control it..
I agree that when we visualize positive outcome good things start happening..We must practice positive habits more often and they will become a part of our daily activities and not foreign anymore. that is why I look at my foreign accent as a part of me…
Thank you for sharing..
Tatyana
Tatyana gann´s last blog ..11 Steps To A Perfect Press Release That Brings Your Instant Credibility, Free Traffic and Make You Stand Out In The Crowd..
August 20th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
You are amazing and such an inspiration!
Nichola´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at
August 20th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
Excellent Stuff, Katie. I too was very intimidated when it came to doing things such as making videos and even cold calling for the first time. Of course we are “slightly” getting out of the days of cold calling, but nevertheless, I overcame my fears. Sometimes you just have to face them head on. Great Article, Katie. As always, I appreciate what you’re doing. It’s in line with what I’m doing so check out my blog site sometime. (I just created it)
Blessings,
Curt Bizelli
August 21st, 2009 at 6:48 pm
HI Katie,
Thanks for sharing your inspiring story. I was raised with so many fears….and grew up terrified of what people thought of me, sure that no one liked me, never feeling accepted; afraid of expressing myself in front of people in any way…but especially verbally. But I’m a visual artist and occasionally I’ve had to speak in front of people. I still feel extremely nervous and still feel like what I really want to say does not come across clearly. I get tongue-tied and feel sick and exhausted but I make myself do it anyway. Same with videos…the first ones were miserable and I was so tight and nervous. I’m still working on them and still not happy with the results, but I can see that there is progress so I keep plugging away at it. My shyness and lack of self-confidence come out in all kinds of ways, from my perspective….but I know that if I keep going forward I will eventually overcome my fear of sounding stupid, looking foolish, being rejected, and on and on. thanks again for inspiring me to go on.
August 22nd, 2009 at 1:58 am
Hi Katie,
Thanks for sharing this amazing story. I think everyone has different kind of fear. I do not have problem in public speaking but I have fear of height due to which I am unable to enjoy Joy rides. Any suggestions
?
Nilendu Bhattacharya´s last blog ..If You Are Introvert and Shy, Ustrasana Can Help You Open Up
August 25th, 2009 at 5:33 pm
Hi Katie
Loved it!! But my pulse rate is still in the process of returning to normal after the read!
I did something similar in confronting my biggest fear. Mine fear was singing! Although I loved it, I was brought up begin told I was hopeless at it and as a consequence I was too scared even to join in during my little children’s singing classes – when they asked the parents to sing hello and their name I would feel my heart pounding and palms sweating as it approached my turn!!
So…what did I do to change it? I started singing lessons with a private tutor. Even at the first lesson I felt like running away. When she asked me to sing one single note I felt as if she may as well have been asking me to take all my clothes off and run around naked! It felt violating! But I had decided to confront this fear and pressed on. My only aim was to be able to sing a nursery rhyme to kids without fear!
Anyway…to cut a long story short….less than 6 months later…there I was…ON STAGE with my 9 year old daughter doing an ABBA duet performance for about 100 people!
If anyone had EVER said I would / could do that (microphones included) I would have laughed my head off.
Like you Katie, I felt such a sense of achievement which was far more significant than just the act of getting up there – as you say…a HUGE weight lifts.
cheers!
Amanda
August 28th, 2009 at 3:23 am
Katie,
I can actually relate from your story. Glad to hear you surpassed the challenge. Saying “yes” from an invitation as a speaker makes me nervous already. I think most people are not confident to speak in front of a crowd, it’s a phenomenon. I already tried it before and just like you my first isn’t that successful. Experience is a great mentor so eventually I learned my lesson and I did it for the second time. It was relieving to see how people responded- you can actually see it through their expressions. Bet my speech is something dramatic. The feeling was overwhelming, it’s like you broke free from a nerve wracking event. Finally, once you’re in the normal mode, you will realize that you have conquered what most people are afraid of. ss
Alex Lim ´s last blog ..Tony Robbins, Frank Kern, And John Reese Interview
September 5th, 2009 at 8:24 pm
Katie,
I just started following your blog since you showed up on Yaro’s. Thanks for the article and the inspiration to face my fears! I’m not sure if my biggest fear is fear of failure or the fear that I have yet again started a venture that isn’t going to develop into something successful. I’ve tried MLM, had my own architectural firm (with a partner), and now I’ve been stubling around online for about a year and a half trying to find the best way for me to bring value to the rest of you out there. I think I’ve found it, but it would be great to get some feedback. http://www.justgreenhomes.net
Thanks,
Dan
Dan Bossenbroek´s last blog ..Your Personal Home Energy Audit – Looking at the Building Envelope
September 21st, 2009 at 6:21 am
Amazing sharing Katie
I’ve read some the material you have shared before about creating your own life the way you want it.. BUT I always thought, yeah right, if you had MY fear of public speech (it is crazy), you would not be able to do all that.
This was REALLY inspiring for me!
I have been very insecure all of my life but I have never admited it to anyone. Not even to my self. I just recently realized that. I successfully put on a mask that I knew would fall off in a public speech (therefore I have avoided public speech like plague), leaving me small in the eyes of the world and my self. Your story TRULY helped me facing this and to meet my fears (and other disturbing feelings) with compassion.
With much thanks and gratitude,
Lars
September 22nd, 2009 at 11:55 am
Hi Katie,
You are a gifted and articulate speaker so reading your story is very inspirational. I feel I have been bogged down with fear but, I know that it is just a mindset. A good lesson to learn from your experience is to visualize exactly how you want the outcome to be. The more you can see and “feel” the outcome, the more you are shaping the reality and the result you want. That is powerful. Thanks, Katie
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:49 am
Hi Katie, thanks for sharing this story.
Fear can be so crippling, its what stops most people from ever achieving in life. What’s really frustrating is when we recognize that a fear is unjustified, but still we can’t shake the feeling. And even more frustrating is that the feeling can stop us dead in our tracks.
What you’ve done here is fantastic, using your conscious mind to push through something that is really wired into the biology of our brains. Fear is an instinctual response and not easy to overcome, especially when it results in extreme physical manifestations like what you had during your first speaking engagement.
Bravo!
Jason Kerchner´s last blog ..The Question to Answer for a Profitable Network Marketing Business
September 27th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Katie,
Great story! Glad to hear that you were able to overcome and make it happen. Everyone reading should learn to do the same and just make it happen.
October 2nd, 2009 at 8:13 pm
Hey Katie,
Great Story, I can’t believe all that happened in front of all those people. I would be embarrassed too in that situation. Reminds me of the time I fell off stage at an acceptance speech.
October 3rd, 2009 at 1:49 am
Dear Katie,
Well done for facing your fears over and over, until you overcame them in enough measure to be able to deliver your speeches. Everyone experiences fear, but nor everyone displays courage. You have chosen the path of courage, and that is a great path. You are beautiful too. May your courage and your beauty open doors for you to make this world a better place for all whom you influence, and may you be a diligent seeker of truth. Best.
Christian Esk´s last blog ..Starved of Your Presence
November 12th, 2009 at 7:52 pm
Dear Katie,
Thank you so much for your post! I enjoy reading what you write and overcoming fear is an especially good topic for me to learn more about!
I have a funny story about public speaking that I think you’ll appreciate:
A few years ago, my husband and I moved and were new at our church. We were sitting in our seats, ready to listen to the speakers and eager to learn. Then, when the person conducting told us who the next speaker would be, my husband and my names were spoken! We thought it was a joke and I almost freaked out when we realized that it wasn’t a joke! I very nervously spoke first and told a bit about myself and my good husband took up the rest of the time (he loves to speak to and teach people). What happened is that someone asked my husband if we could speak and he said yes and forgot about it.
Keep up the good work, Katie! Your posts are awesome!
In Success,
Elizabeth Stowers
November 24th, 2009 at 5:57 pm
Thanks Katie for sharing I honestly believe I am at that point in my life where I would love to overcome my fear of failure that has been holding me back from achieving any kind of success on the internet. I just feel like my hands are tied and I can not take the chance of failure and I realize that this has to be overcome before I can get any further in life after reading your blog I realized past failures as a stepping stone hopefully to break out of that mindset. I am glad I came across your blog as you seem so wise for a person of such a young age, Thanks for your sharing
December 18th, 2009 at 6:27 am
Katie pubic speaking is also my biggest fear. I tried to overcome it by starting a mastermind call each week for my team and I remember sweating and being nervous, so I decided to write down what I wanted to say, it helped a little but each time the fear of what people are thinking rose up in me, I know they could not see me but… Then my upline made me get up in front of the room and tell a story of how a day of prospecting with a millionaire was, I thought I was gonna die there were about 100 people staring at me, I was nervous, sweating I wanted to throw up, I felt like I was rambling, did not remembered what I said but everyone laughed at my joke and applauded loudly. I am still nervous about it but I will TRY it again someday.
Thanks
Lori Robertson
Lori Robertson´s last blog ..How Much Time and Money Should I Spend On My Education In Becoming An Entrepreneur?
December 28th, 2009 at 11:45 am
Hi Katie,
I loved your story about overcoming fear of public speaking. I remember the day I did it. I was 19 years old, in college and in a speech class. I always used to freeze up when I had to give a talk in other classes. This time I stood up and started speaking without fear or nervousness. Everything went smoothly and I have enjoyed public speaking ever since.
Bill Briggs
January 5th, 2010 at 12:24 pm
Congratulations, Katie! You really conquered a giant. What an inspiring story. You are a real inspiration to many people. You had the courage to try again after a “failure”. It was really a growth leap forward. If only we all could see these growth leaps, we would not be so afraid. Thank you for sharing you experience.
Phyllis
January 8th, 2010 at 10:53 pm
Hi Katie, thanks so much for sharing. Your blog is so interesting to read. I cannot agree more to all the things you say, very well done for your achievement. For me , anything I fear, I will make a point of doing it, and continue to take action because I know it is the best way to conquer fear.
Starting an online business has been my fear for a long time but I am doing it now. I have launched my first website, http://www.ebusinessproduct.com
there are still many many things I can do to make it works better so I can help to inspire other people. I know I can improve by learning and growing. Everything start with the first step. If we do not start, we will never get anywhere.
I can go on and on, but I will stop here to day and post more comment soon. Take care and speak soon. Well done again
January 29th, 2010 at 11:49 am
Dear Katie,
I can relate very much to your experience. I had to make a short presentation, but in English, German, Spanish and French in front of about 1200 people. I made the English, I made the Spanish….. and my brain was blank… just thinking: “Which language is on now?” So I was just standing there on stage – saying absolutely nothing. Then it came back and I finished, but the Director was not really too nice to me afterwards…… Anyway, never happened again and I made many many more of those introductions.
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February 13th, 2010 at 1:13 am
Great article, Katie, and an amazing story. To me the key message there was you realizing you had to focus on what you had to GIVE the audience. This resonates with your larger message about social networking. You’re great at it! Thanks for giving.
March 7th, 2010 at 2:54 pm
Aloha Katie,
What was your biggest fear has been my greatest passion-public speaking and training, I absolutely love that! But what you made me realize is that we all have our own individual strengths. We have skills and attributes that lie dormant, and are ready to be honed in on and shaped. I also learned from my mentors is that what you may be terrific at, I may not be so good at, and to recognize the power of the team. Putting together a team of individual strengths where each can shine with their greatest contribution to the world! I loved what you shared about shifting the perspective from being self-conscious to being a person of contribution and giving, which immediately positions you into a self-less, legacy leaving leader!
Thanks a bunch Katie!
Shannon Tecson
Shannon Tecson´s last blog ..Amongst Other Gifts You Can Gain Through A Home Based Business